more TMI period fun!

Captain's log, day four.

I'm no stranger to pain, but now I am beginning day four of this period that has been sent from the depths of hell. Or at least that is what it seems like. It feels as if my uterus has been attached to a taffy pulling machine and is being stretched to extremely unrealistic proportions, not to mention the fact that I think my uterus itself might actually weigh similarly to a small bowling ball. 

I won't even get into the clots. You would have nightmares if I went into details with that.

Sometimes I do wish I could go around wearing a shirt that said "UNCLEAN," just so people would leave me alone. 

I used to go to the doctor who would say to my mom, "has she not been complaining about how bad she feels?" Especially when it came to things like double ear infections or strep throat. "No, she never complains about pain."

Years ago when I got a full side piece on the right side of my torso, I had a group of men standing around me gawking at this skinny person who was getting needled right on her rib cage and not grimacing at all. The tattoo artist kept asking if I didn't need to take a break. I told him no, but if he needed a break he could take one.

Basically what I'm saying is that I'm not one to balk at the pain. But I've been balking. Yesterday I broke out the heating pad and I've taken so many ibuprofen that I've probably given myself a stomach ulcer or melted away some lining of my intestines. I couldn't even do my driveway walking because I wanted to hunch over like an old lady.

Fortunately my sister-in-law didn't bring the kids back home until around 4 pm yesterday, so at least I was able to lay around and literally do nothing. 

I did complain of painful periods once or twice to my gynecologist and they basically brushed it off as something you just have to deal with. But I honestly do not believe everyone has periods like this. Fortunately it's not like this all the time, but it's easy for me to pinpoint my distrust of doctors when none of the ones I have ever been to as an adult have taken me seriously. So now I just don't go, and I text my pharmacist brother for all my medical needs. Anyway, I'm basically a witch doctor. I'm sure I would have been tried as a witch in Salem just for knowing all these natural herbs and roots. But it fascinating to me that our bodies are mostly defunct of the vitamins and minerals that used to grow naturally in our fruits and vegetables, but then along came chemicals, pesticides and GMOs, and we're basically eating our way to cancer. 

This started out about my period and then moved into naturopathy. Now it's going to conclude with a dress. 

Back before the plague when I used to regularly visit the $5 store and go on a treasure hunt with my family, my mom and I would dig through all the 50 cent amazon clothes boxes. I bought this dress originally thinking it would be something cute and comfortable to wear on our next vacation. But then the plague hit and I forgot all about this dress until yesterday, so remembering it was like finding a gift. And then realizing it has pockets was like a double whammy surprise. (In a good way.)

One of the little girls in the preschool class I help out with asked me if I was a teacher, because she says I dress like one. I guess teachers dress a little differently today than they did when I was a kid, always wearing holiday and alphabet themed clothing. But I do always wear a cardigan, so I guess I have the Mr. Rogers thing going on.