Happy National Day or Mourning.
The days seem to go by so quickly for me, although there seem to be so many hours in each day now, especially since I am usually awake by 4 am. Since my brain is mostly working these days I've been able to catch up on my bible reading each morning as well as dive into some new topics and ideas before everyone else wakes up. I have read through the bible every year for the past 8 years and this is the first year that I don't know if I will finish it. Pre-covid I would read 30-45 minutes each morning, but this past year my focus has been so bad that I was happy if I could read a single chapter. With the LDN I seem to be able to read for 30 minutes most mornings.
It's just me and Sheldon each morning. Sheldon who snores like a human. Sheldon who smells like doritos. Sheldon who tries to take over my heat blanket. Even Frankie joins in on the heat blanket action some mornings, but most of the time she just wants to go outside at 4:30 am.
My life took a dramatic shift when I was born again eight years ago. And then, recently, I have felt another huge paradigm shift in reality. It feels as if the bottom has dropped out. Like the curtain has been ripped away and for the first time in my life I am seeing how everything is a lie. And I know I've said that before, but now I do truly believe that everything that we think we know about history from the 1700s until today is a total and absolute engineered reality to enslave and brainwash us. We react to certain topics because we have been emotionally conditioned to be prejudiced. We have been intentionally molded into the society we are today.
I was watching a youtube documentary, Old World Photoshop, about how photo editing has been going on since the 1800s, so how do we even know the pictures of 'history' we have seen aren't just staged propaganda? How many pictures in our history books were completely fabricated?
I am seriously believing a lot of fringe theories lately. It honestly feels like my mind is picking up where it left off two years ago. I'm back into researching Tartaria and time line deception. (Unfortunately, my threshold to consume new information is much lower than before. I can feel my brain starting to hurt when I concentrate too hard.) Certain dots that I could never connect are finally connecting, and I've never felt so far from the church in America. It is heartbreaking to think of the idolatry that 'white Jesus' has become. You can trace the Hellenistic roots all the way back to the first century. And I do believe our bible tells us what we need to know, but I also wonder how much was manipulated by King James. There is always an agenda.
I used to believe that it was ok to celebrate Christmas because at least it had people talking about Jesus, but that was leaning on my own understanding, and now I do not believe we should be celebrating any holiday, especially not Christmas or Easter. And you know what, I am stepping on my own toes here because my family and I always attend these holiday dinners with our extended family, even if to us it is just a family meal and nothing else.
I will admit that it is hard to completely pull away from these things when you are concerned about offending your family. And it is especially hard when you've already started holiday traditions with your children. But who is more important, our creator or our family? I really do believe if we humbled ourselves and asked the Lord if he approved of us celebrating these days, he would firmly say no. It is only our pride and arrogance that keeps us rooted in these pagan festivities. (Like I said, stepping on my own toes here.)
I am beginning to feel like a warrior again. Thank you, thank you, thank you. If I cannot seem to be grounded in actual reality, I am so glad to be able to live in my head again.
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