the last day of harry

We ultimately decided not to go on the (8th annual?) Christmas family beach trip. I keep getting notifications on google maps of what we were doing exactly two years ago. Getting covid and changing the lives of the four of us forever, that's what. Maybe even killing a kangaroo or two. Eh, but that is not why we didn't go. I'm not scared of getting covid again. I've probably had it three or four times already. It is hard to tell when you refuse to get tested. But my brain always feels this really weird and completely different way when I have covid, so I know I've had it more than a couple times. You get sick. You stay home while you are sick. It is really something even a college dropout can understand. 

So now, as 10 members of my family wake up in a house together, I am sitting in the dark drinking coffee with Sheldon glued to my side. And I am feeling so glad we decided to stay home. Granted, it would have been great for Gage to get out. We have all become very weird over the past two years, but while I feel like Owsley and I are slowly crawling out of it, Gage is still stuck right in the middle. I know he's depressed, but he won't talk to anyone and I have major reservations of him going on an antidepressant so young. 

But I don't think the beach would have been the cure for him either. Especially since he doesn't like the beach any more than I do. He was always given a choice. If he had wanted to go, you better believe he could have. 

Owsley has been going back to the food bank with me again, sometimes up to three times a week. He will either wake up at 6 and do his schoolwork so that he can go with me, or he will catch up on his work on Wednesdays and Fridays. I can see his brain healing because he wants that social aspect back in his life, even if it is mostly with people his grandparents age. That is ok. He needs to know how to communicate with all kinds of people. He's also started going to church with my memaw because there are more kids there. I hope he meets a good friend there. He has a good internet friend that I often hear him laughing with. He just needs a real life friend. 

My kids didn't have problems with a lack of social interaction before we got covid. And then we become robots for a while and just kind of let all our relationships slip away. Obviously I am the mom here and I take full responsibility, but Owsley is just now coming around to where he even wants to be social again. I hope this means something in our brains is healing. I have felt a little different too. But since I have super expensive urine it is hard to tell what changes in me are natural versus chemical.

Anyway, back to the beach house. The food bank is closed for ten days. I think this is a very long time to be closed, but I don't make the decisions. I didn't realize how much a relief it has felt to not have to schedule people, or watch my phone for last minute "I'm sick" texts. I don't even like being connected to my phone to begin with and prefer it to be on silent with notifications off. So the past four days of not having to worry about that has been great. I have gotten a few texts from people saying they can't come in this week, and I wonder how many of our volunteers just don't look at the boards or listen to our announcements. I wonder how many will show up this week to an empty office. This was a stress I didn't realize I was even carrying, so it has been nice to get a break from scheduling. 

Owsley wanted me to get him a surprise Harry Potter ball and insisted I get one for Gage...who got Ron. Of course he got Ron. If we go back to Universal and Gage continues to let his hair grow he might be confused for a love child of Snape and a Weasley. Although I truly believe he would miss the Ron Weasley references. 

We have this tradition of writing some random sender's name on whatever packages the kids get.

This has me dying. My mom got me and my brothers' families a canvas portrait. Everyone else had a great picture, and THIS is the one she used of us. We have so, so, so many better pictures she could have chosen from. I literally do not understand what she was thinking. It is almost like she only looked at me and didn't acknowledge the three other insane expressions. Oh well, at least I cannot stop laughing. I put it in Peppy's office but he said it makes him sad to look at. 

Gage really does love his Memaw. She's actually pretty lucky that he willingly hugs her.

I told Gage that in order to celebrate the '3rd day of Harry' he needed to give six hugs out. We would hurry and make him stand still for a picture whenever he hugged anyone because we can never get him in pictures anymore.

I don't even know. I was getting some turkey and my mom told me to turn around. Even this would have been better on a canvas. 

The day after Christmas, nine of us, ranging from 9-62 played "kids against maturity" the family friendly version of "cards against humanity." Although 'family friendly' is a loose term. We had so much fun and playing games with my family (and Peppy's family) are always my favorite things about when we get together. It will be the one thing I miss about the trip. 

I know they will have a good time at the beach house, but I really needed this time to not have any responsibilities aside from my family, and I didn't even know I needed that. It has been nice knowing I don't have to get up in the morning and rush through my morning rituals so I can get ready and head to the food bank. I really haven't done anything other than start cleaning out my closet. We rented Nope last night and I fell asleep within the first fifteen minutes and woke up for the last fifteen. Everyone else said the middle hour and a half was good though. 

Happy 6th (and final) day of Harry!