*M&Ms get rid of their chocolate covered mascots because of wokeness. Although they did also announce a special 'female only' bag, featuring only the colors green, brown, and purple. Apparently Green and Brown are lesbians and Purple is plus-sized. Who knew candy was this in depth? I'm going to start giving a backstory to all my food.
*An AI chatbot app faces backlash for letting users talk to pedophiles and Hitler. You know, so many people are using these chatbots. I'm not sure people understand the implications of this. People are just feeding this AI constantly. It is continuously learning and understanding, growing at an absolutely exponential rate. And that is terrifying to think about. Another thing to think about is the AI takeover of online journalism and other virtual jobs.
*We may reach technological singularity within seven years. Looks like AI will become sentient just in time for the great reset.
*Scientists warn giant asteroid is actually a swarm of particles that is nearly impossible to destroy.
*"Why didn't the unvaccinated do more to warn us? A lot of blood is now on their hands." Wait...what? I hope this is satire. Every unvaccinated person I know was very vocal on their stance. Let's not play ignorant here.
*Humans still have the genes for a full coat of body hair.
*3000 more Brits are dying each week than usual. The massive spike causes an urgent investigation.
*Spy plane spots metallic orb flying over Iraq.
*Lab grown meats move closer and closer to American dinner plates.
*The rare green comet that passes earth on February 1st has grown a strange 'anti-tail' that is facing the wrong direction.
*Mysterious ocean whitening seen from space stumps scientists.
*After her husband was attacked, Nancy Pelosi held an exorcism in her home to banish evil spirits.
*Man dies of heart attack while watching Avatar 2, possibly from excitement.
*Mike Pence discovers classified documents in his home.
*People on r/conspiracy are always reposting instagram posts from Britney Spears because people claim she is being held hostage or that she is being trafficked and that her posts are code for something. I'm just kind of under the belief that she has gone crazy, and to be perfectly honest, who could blame her? But she posted this bizarre message last night and then her account was deleted.
*A massive void under the Great Pyramid of Giza has been discovered. It is believed to have been closed for 4500 years.
*Today the Doomsday Clock moved to '90 seconds to midnight.'
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