where to begin

I've had this five day roaming occipital migraine since last Sunday. Yesterday was the first day it started to really let up, and finally today it is gone. I think, I hope. I started having an aura last Sunday and then it just kind of traveled around the TN affected side of my face. Fortunately these are not the nauseating and thunderclap migraines, and are more of a dull, pulling annoyance with the back of my head sore like I knocked it on a cabinet or the car trunk. These typed of headaches are usually brought on by stress. I'm not pointing any fingers, but there is a direct correlation between life events and when my headache came on. Hah. 

It is over now, and that is all that counts.

Yesterday I was reading something on my laptop and I could kind of feel an aura trying to creep back up in my left eye, so I closed my laptop and put in on my coffee table, and I kid you not, I had the real sensation that I was closing a book and just forgetting what it was about. Like I could close the simulation of the internet and toss it aside, like it didn't even exist. (Because I mean, it doesn't. We are existing in a simulation inside of a simulation. You break free from one and have to realize you're still trapped in a false history.) But it was really so cool because I had never experienced anything like that before. I had completely compartmentalized the entire internet in my mind. 

It was the most interesting mental thing I've personally experienced in a while, and I just kind of sat there in awe, reveling in the feeling that the internet suddenly did not even exist in my mind at the moment. But I guess it makes sense considering this blog and reddit are the extent of my social media presence, and I think for me with all the lies online, the internet= social media in my mind. And because I don't exist in that tiktok/instragram/twitter world I can close it just as quickly as a boring fiction book that holds zero interest. 

I'm not saying that was a vision, but it sure felt real, and I knew what it meant. My name is not in the book of death. I am not trapped in this world of artificial. My name is in the book of life. 

Our body exists in this world, only we have to understand that everything we've been taught as our history is also a lie, so we've got to peel back that layer as well to see what's left. We realize that our soul is eternal and our body is currently set with limitations during this life, which will pass away.  Hopefully you've got your family and friends, and if you're lucky you have a relationship with the Lord. And that's reality. That's where you start from once you remove all the layers to what is organic and not artificial.