Do you know what true repentance is? It certainly isn't putting all your faith in yourself and trying your hardest to cut out that vice/sin/bad habit in your life. That might work out for a little while if you can discipline yourself, but it will never last, and you'll find yourself deeper in sin than before. True repentance is admitting you can't do this alone, and crying out to God for help trying to understand why you even participate in that particular act anyway. It is recognizing the root of your problem and flat out being disgusted with yourself for your actions. It is banging your fists on your chest in anguish because it hurts you so much to do the things that upset the Lord. It is acknowledging that this will be a constant fight between your spirit and your flesh, and knowing that as long as you are in the Lord's hands, you will be ok.
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. The spirit wants you to meditate on the eternal. It wants you to die to yourself every day and to always remember that this life is just a blip, a wink, a dream. The flesh wants you to focus on the now. It wants you to focus solely on yourself and your desires. It wants you to be number one. It wants you to gravitate on all the pain, sadness, or negativity you feel and do anything ANYTHING you have to do in order to quiet down the voice of the flesh.
Unfortunately it doesn't work that way. You feed your flesh and it doesn't yawn and take a nap like a good little flesh bag. No, the more you feed the flesh, the more that monster grows and grows and grows like a parasitic twin that is slowly sucking you of your nutrients (or biblically speaking, "quenching the spirit.")
"Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming." Colossians 3:5-6
In the scriptures, before Christ is arrested, he tells Peter he will deny him three times. Peter, still without the Holy Spirit and living in the flesh, arrogantly says, "OH HO HO, no way Lord. Not me! I would never." (Clearly not a direct quote here.)
But then Peter does deny that he knows Jesus, three separate times like Jesus had pre-told him. I recently heard Peter's denial referred to as a 'humiliating mistake.' I disagree. I think this is a beautiful story of repentance. (I don't know about you, but I have certainly found myself doing things that I thought I never would.) To me, the example of Peter is a comfort because when we sin it is no surprise to the Lord. He knew we would do it before we did. Although this is not a free-for-all to sin just because God is not surprised.
When Peter understood exactly what he did, he wept bitterly. I don't know about you, but this doesn't sound like a tear or two at a romcom. This sounds like he was crying in anguish. He deeply regretted what he did. This wasn't an, "Oh well, he knows my heart!" No. This was a hurting cry. He was sorrowful.
"Godly sorrow leads to repentance that leads to salvation, which leads to no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death." 2 Corinthians 7:10
Maybe you've got something in your life you just cannot shake. Maybe you keep finding yourself in the same sin and you constantly feel guilty. Stop trying to fix it yourself. Take it to God, the great healer and counselor. Ask him to show you why you can't seem to give up this particular sin when you want to. Or maybe you enjoy continuing in a sin, but deep down you know it is wrong. Pray for a repentant heart. This is how you repent. There has to be a desire to change, a regret for the actions you've committed, and an understanding that you cannot do this by yourself.
This world and its artificial pleasures are passing away, but we will continue after this. We will all answer for the things we have done. I don't know about you, but I'd rather not have a guilty conscience when I see our creator face-to-face.
"If you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the rind hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on the earth." Colossians 3:1-2
"For many walk as enemies of God. Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. But our citizenship is even heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself." Philippians 3:18-21
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