I see headlines (that I refuse to click on) claiming one potential VP has had sex with a couch and the other drinks horse semen. 2024 is really starting to sound like headlines from Weekly World News. I personally cannot wait for Batboy, although he is probably hiding out in fear of being blamed for coronavirus.
This past weekend Peppy and I attended the wedding of my good friend's daughter. At 40 years old, this was my very first time attending a reception that included dancing. Growing up super legalistically, with 'rules' that were more traditions, I had been taught that dancing was a sin. (Having read the bible numerous times I still can't find that verse if anyone can point me there.) I never thought it was a sin, although I could see how it could lead to sinful activities. Luckily for my mom, due to extreme social anxiety I never cared about going to any school dances anyway. But if you would have asked her, at school dances and at the prom, you could just look at someone and they would end up pregnant or with an STD. Gateways to hell. Anyway, I'm just trying to set the scene for you. I've never been to a dance, and all the wedding receptions I have been to have been more similar to a church potluck than an actual celebration.
There was so much joy in the air that it was palpable. It was electric and it reminded me of how strongly I felt everyone's emotions at the last funeral I attended. The celebration and happiness was absolutely contagious. People were up and dancing to stuff like YMCA and Kool and the Gang "Celebration." It reminded me of the excitement of cruise departure day. I was so happy for my friend's daughter, but also for my friend, because she has had one thing after another happen these last few months. Seeing her so carefree made me feel good.
Days later it hit me like a ton of bricks that this is what the marriage to Christ would be like. No, not dorky 70s and 80s music and a conga line, but that happiness and expectation of a good future to come. That feeling of community and togetherness. To be honest with you, I guess I never truly understood a marriage celebration. I have always been around people for holidays and happy occasions, but I have never understood that feeling of celebration. Yes, I have been to parties, but this was a different feeling altogether. I know that probably sounds weird, but due to anxieties and a strict childhood, I missed out on some things that were completely normal to everyone else, and just moved on with my life. We just perceive life with our own tinted goggles, and I had never taken those particular ones off before. And like I said, I had never attended a single reception with dancing before, so this was new territory to me. The DJ kept bringing us all in and including everyone for pictures and activities, so it felt like a communal happiness in a way that I had never known. Maybe we didn't all know each other, but we were there for this couple, and we could come together for that.
Joy and happiness are never anything that have happened naturally for me, so this really did feel like another puzzle piece was put into place. I assume that most people feel this automatically, and maybe that is a reason they enjoy living and being alive. Why have I not ever been able to experience that? Even as a child I thought most everything was annoying and irrelevant.
Anyway, this is not a post about the unfairness in being able to feel that celebration feeling throughout my life when now I KNOW other people feel it regularly. (Because I do have my theories, and my brain can go on a tangent.) It is no surprise to me that my brain doesn't work like the majority.
Finally understanding a true wedding celebration feels like a gift. I didn't know that I didn't even know.
It is insane how little we actually know.
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