Let your yes be yes, and your no be no. Remember that you don't have to explain your answers to anyone. If you set a boundary and someone chooses to ignore it, you DO NOT have to engage in their questions. To overstep a boundary because you think you deserve anything from anyone is a manipulative and obnoxious behavior.
"I said no/ I said I can't" are suitable answers. Some of us have been conditioned that we have to explain all our answers in depth, or that if someone pushes back on a boundary we are not allowed to stand firm. If you tell an adult 'no' and they can't accept that, it doesn't say anything about you. But it does say everything about them.
If you say 'no' and a narcissist in your life tries to guilt you, don't let them. Do not let that energy vampire receive anything but a calm response from you.
Don't let a narcissist control your emotions. When you can recognize the mind games they are playing you can more easily remove yourself from them. It is so much easier to cut yourself some slack when you can acknowledge who the real problem is. The only time that I feel "all's fair in mind games and war" is when you're dealing with a narcissist. Give them exactly what they are throwing at you, because they love looking in a mirror.
Checkmate.
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