the end is the beginning

I'm pretty used to going against the norm. I believe it's probably my inherent nature. My whole childhood I was called weird.  (Like that's a bad thing. It's not.) I never really fit in. I had my friends, but I didn't go out of my way to be friendly with the popular crowd. I just never really cared. You could like me, you could hate me. It really never personally bothered me. To most people I was invisible, and that was actually how I prefered it. Maybe I could have been an anthropologist, because I'm really good at observing and studying human behavior without being noticed. And right now it seems like a large portion of humans have gone insane and are under a mass delusion.  I believe much of this delusion could be cured if social media and tv were cut out of their lives.  People who are insecure in their version of reality will always react with hostility and aggression towards anyone who sees things differently. Keep spreading the truth and pay no attention ...

*Every once in a while I will look at a picture and immediately get a visceral reaction.  This   was one of those times. Don't worry, it's not NSFW or anything like that. It's just troubling to think that life could become one big advertisement. At least now you can unplug and go outside. What about when that privilege is taken away? *Disney UK  staycation cruises  are only accepting vaccinated passengers. Children 18 and under must have had a negative covid test in the past 72 hours. Delta airlines are also having special  vaccinated only flights . *The US Department of Defense recently admitted that the leaked 2019   UFO footage was real.   Just in time to start prepping us for whatever they plan to announce in July.  * Missing German girl  appears 500 miles away in Paris two weeks later, with no recollection of who she is. *This is a great opinion piece on exposing  AI social media bots.   *Another opinion piece on the  imp...

Someone on reddit posted a website for a  burlesque and sideshow catalog  from the 1930s. I love old stuff like this. If you do check out this link, it's much better viewed on a laptop instead of a phone. The background is a little wild to look at on a small screen. The website claims that although the products are advertised for burlesque shows and carnivals, many of the items purchased were actually used for masonic rituals. In fact, if you read many of the testimonials under the items it mentions how they were each used to hazing rituals in masonic lodges.  Lots of vaccine articles in this edition of weird things. As the weeks go by, I become even more skeptical of the covid vaccine, especially considering MSM is grossly underreporting the negative reactions and adverse effects. Let's go ahead and dive in.  *An  unvaccinated worker   set off a covid outbreak in a nursing home where a majority of the residents were already vaccinated.  *Yale public h...

  They didn't need me at the food bank today. It has been slower than normal lately, both the food and financial sides. I hope that's a good thing and that people are working and don't need financial assistance. I didn't tell my kids that I didn't have to go in, and instead went shopping with a Marshalls gift card that was left over from Christmas. I cannot remember the last time that I leisurely went clothing shopping. And alone, at that. It was nice to do something so seemingly normal. They had great clearance deals and I got a few sweatshirts and hoodies for $4. Obviously I'm not going to need a hoodie anytime soon. But deals are deals. And if I am anything, I am cheap. Actually, there are a lot of words you could use to describe me, but cheap is definitely one of them. Frugal. Frugal is probably a better word. Thank you for the prayers after yesterday's post. Growing up I often fantasized about our car driving off a bridge, or crashing into a tree. I day...

If you are reading this, I could use some prayers. I don't even know how to go about explaining what I'm feeling (or not feeling, for that matter.) Feelings and emotions are so hard to put into something tangible. In The Dark Crystal the gelflings can share experiences through what they call the dream space. That would be nice sometimes. When you can't put into words what you want to say, you just touch fingers and suddenly that person is literally experiencing life from your perspective. I thought I had a breakthrough the other day because I started crying at Willie Nelson's cover of The Scientist. But it must have just been hormones because I'm back to being an apathetic robot person. I was momentarily on the other side of the fog. But it was just a glitch in the matrix apparently. (I'm not even sure if I posted about this already. My lack of short term memory recall is such a total bummer.) Being alive right now is draining. Sometimes I don't even want to...

There have been more than 50 mass shootings in the past month. Are people fed up with being stuck inside and they are finally snapping, or could there be something even more nefarious going on? In order to understand what is going on today, we have to look into the past. Unfortunately most of our true history has been glossed over, or even blatantly changed. Sometimes the cognitive dissonance is so strong that many of us are unable to see past the veil.  April 19th is the first day of the 13 day period of time known as "The Blood Sacrifice to the Beast/ Feast of Moloch," that culminate on the occult holy day of Beltane (fire of Baal), which is May 1st. The Old Testament cult of Baal never disappeared. It's been lingering in the background (sometimes hidden in plain sight) throughout the centuries. The worship of Baal has taken many different names over time, Enlil and Molech, but it remains the same entity that is being worshipped. Baal is a sun god and a god of fertility...

I am forever making notes for myself. I have never been a person who notices small details. I'm not very good at those "what's wrong with the picture" puzzles. Someone could literally run naked in front of me, and unless I was staring directly in their direction I wouldn't notice. Even then, I might actually be staring through them and still not see them. And now, even with these neon sticky notes on my accounting computer, I don't remember to put last name first. I think I am going to have to resort to a flashing neon sign.  Well, I've collected another round of strange news stories. I didn't plan on posting another group of links so soon, but man is the news disturbing lately, or what? Also disturbing...the trend of mom jeans that doesn't seem to be going anywhere. They look just as stupid as they did 30 years ago. But that's cool if you want to look like you're wearing a diaper. Who am I to judge? I'm anxiously awaiting the return o...

I've been thinking a lot about the vaccine lately. Every week more and more free perks are added to your life if you've received both your shots. That alone should raise red flags.  And what about how people talk about how crappy they feel after they've been jabbed, but "it's worth it." Where is that phrase coming from? Everyone is using that exact same phrase and it sounds like I am living in an episode of the Twilight Zone.  "I feel absolutely miserable and I can't stop leaking from both ends, but it's worth it."  "I have been in bed for three days and I can't feel either of my legs, but I know it's worth it." Let's imagine that pandemic two hits and those that were vaccinated with this experimental gene therapy end up being more susceptible to the new virus, and it kills them. There go our elderly, but also our doctors and front line workers. Life would be thrown into utter chaos.  There was an article that found  vac...

I've decided to just have an ongoing list of weird things that I see online and I will periodically post them when I feel like I've got a nice haul. Dudes, I don't know if it's allergies (probably) but I took 3 (THREE!) naps on both Friday and Saturday, and was still able to sleep well throughout the night. Ah, springtime, when my body kindly reminds me that I am allergic to being a human. And then this morning Peppy's alarm went off and I went back to sleep for another hour and a half, which is not something I can ever do. Once the alarm goes off, I'm wide awake.  I'm loving seeing all that green, and every day a little more grass decides to make itself known. It is also pleasant that we can no longer see our neighbors on either side due to the abundance of green.  New studies are showing that people who had coronavirus have immunity  up to 8 months.  This is great news because they were initially estimating 90 days. Bad news is that 1 in 3 covid patients a...

I was waiting on some cookies to bake-copy cat carrot cake cookies from Trolley Car Cafe in Hollywood studios-for those of you who really need to know, when I came across an article that claims optical illusions reveal how depression changes visual perception of a person. The study concluded that people with depression perceived the visual illusion significantly weaker than those with no depression episodes.  Here are some facts: 1. I am a person. 2. I've had a chemical imbalance for as long as I can remember. 3. I have always loved, loved, LOVED optical illusions. I can see it all. source Is this doing anything or you? I got nothing. Usually it would be like some acid trip head spins, but now it's just not doing anything. So obviously the next logical thing for me to do would be to google "optical illusions," which lead me to  25 cool optical illusion pictures to challenge your mind.  My mind could use some challenging lately.  This is the only one that really did a...

**I felt like I needed to add an  update  to my testimony. I am still a believer 100%, but some things have changed.** I'm not going to lie, it gives me a little anxiety posting this. Not because it brings up bad memories or anything, but because the truth of how I came to Christ is a little unbelievable. Six years ago I was shaken to the core, and everything I thought I knew was suddenly up in question. My reality suddenly expanded and then shifted. If I had not experienced it firsthand I don't think I would believe it either.  Throughout the years I have shared my story with a handful of people that I know online, but I never told many people in real life because they wouldn't believe me. So aside from the cliff notes version of "blah blah blah caught up in new age deception blah blah" I just kept it to myself and only shared with particular people that God brought into my life. I'm feeling this pull to share it publicly now, and it is my prayer that you wil...

I was always taught that God always answers your prayers one of three ways: Yes, no, or wait a while. I prefer immediately answered prayers (who doesn't?) and I always have the hardest with waiting a while.  Peppy got a new job. It's kind of crazy how it happened.  When Peppy got hired at his current job, his title was Red Bull Evolution Manager. He had a guy above him who, for lack of a better term, was an alcoholic. We'll call him Ron. Peppy was constantly picking up Ron's slack, and when it came time for presentations, Peppy would do all the work and Ron would take the credit. This happened for almost three years. If Ron ever worked from home, you could call him at 10 am and he would already be drunk. Peppy and I would often talk about how Ron even still had his job. Everyone knew he was drunk all the time. Why didn't they fire him? It made no sense to me, but I prayed daily for the situation. Last June, Ron was found half-naked wandering around a neighborhood ve...

We ordered our furniture in September and our last piece finally came in last week. Most everything else had arrived by the time we moved in, like the couch, and most importantly, the beds. But we were still waiting on our dining room table.  There was a brief moment after I cut open the first box that I wondered what I had just done. There was no turning back. I got the chairs and table finished last night and then I assembled the two benches this afternoon. I really like it, and it's SO sturdy. It there's a midnight break-in, I will legit bust a chair over someone's head.  Do I have anything else to add while I'm here? Not really. Life is just moving along, but I still feel like I'm waiting in limbo to see what comes next. What new way to adapt to life is right around the corner?  This is such a weird time to be alive. I'm so glad I live in the middle of nowhere. 

My brain has been mostly functional so far this week. I'm enjoying it while it's lasting, but I won't get my hopes up because the fog, it already tricked me once back the first week of February. I thought, "Wow! I'm cured! I'm better! I'm back!" But then less than a week later I was back in the fog, which lasted almost six weeks. So who knows how long this clarity will last? Is it here to stay? Is this just a teaser? I feel like with most of this residual covid stuff it comes and goes in waves. Just when you are finally resigned to whatever is going on, something switches again. Like today, I have literally taken 3 long naps, and I basically had no control.  So I have taken this primo brain time to research into giants and the nephilim, and ancient secrets of the Vatican. You know, just a regular Thursday. (Maybe more on this later if my brain cooperates.) Recently I have come across Morgellons disease. I hadn't heard of it before last week and now...