the end is the beginning

We ultimately decided not to go on the (8th annual?) Christmas family beach trip. I keep getting notifications on google maps of what we were doing exactly two years ago. Getting covid and changing the lives of the four of us forever, that's what. Maybe even killing a kangaroo or two. Eh, but that is not why we didn't go. I'm not scared of getting covid again. I've probably had it three or four times already. It is hard to tell when you refuse to get tested. But my brain always feels this really weird and completely different way when I have covid, so I know I've had it more than a couple times. You get sick. You stay home while you are sick. It is really something even a college dropout can understand.  So now, as 10 members of my family wake up in a house together, I am sitting in the dark drinking coffee with Sheldon glued to my side. And I am feeling so glad we decided to stay home. Granted, it would have been great for Gage to get out. We have all become very w...

(I'm too lazy to reformat this post, so let's just go with it.) Last night the four of us went to dinner and decided to celebrate Festivus, where we would air our grievances about each other. This was Peppy's idea, because he is the only one who has ever seen Seinfeld. I don't remember what any of the grievances were this morning (big surprise,) but fortunately we didn't have anything too mean to say. We might be an odd family to some, but we are a close unit. On Thursday Owsley actually told me that I was the only person he knows who could have a bad experience in Walmart and then come back out to the car humming and in a good mood. Holy Spirit and brain damage unite! I hope that didn't come across sacrilegious because I didn't mean it to be. After dinner we went to see Avatar: Way of the Water. We had been planning to see it before we could see any spoilers. We all loved the first movie so much. I think we all just enjoy getting sucked into these fantastic...

*The New York Times crossword puzzle was looking a little odd on the first day of Hanukkah. *As China pushes its  digital currency  the US falls right behind. *After a storm, parts of  whales  wash up on NYC streets. *Oxford, England introduces restrictions for  private vehicles  starting in 2023. It sounds like just driving to work every day will use up your allotted credits.  *The CDC page shows that  heart attacks  are occurring more frequently in covid vaccinated young teen boys, and yet they still recommend them. Sometimes I just sit back and think about the insanity that the world is and I wonder how we got here, and my brain thinks that somehow this must be Satan's 'little season.' Reality has become like the worst scy-fy channel movie. Much worse than Sharknado and no one is really talking about it. They are just going about their lives like nothing is happening. It feels like I'm living in the movie "They Live." source *It is one deg...

Tis the season for food gifts. They gave us some banana bread at the food bank earlier this week, and one of the deacons at church gave all the teachers and helpers these little bundt cakes. It was so good and bigger than it looks. I was able to share this with Peppy and Owsley. We are on our winter break from school. Peppy's sister and husband came over on Monday for dinner and she asked how long we had off school. Hah, no clue. Perks of homeschool.  I love my psychiatrist. Those are words I never thought I would speak. First off, I am initially pretty closed off for a while in person, and I could never imagine sitting and talking about myself. Pretending to be a talk show host and interviewing myself in the mirror while I was getting dressed? Yes. But just not in front of a real life person. In person vulnerability is the best way to see me ugly cry, and I don't even know why. I don't have any weird trauma (that I know about,) but I have put up a huge fortress of a wall t...

Ah, Monday. I have been looking forward to Monday because I don't have anything to do this morning. I have a lot later on (groceries, Gage's chess club and my weekly Revelation zoom meeting-also I need to read that chapter and commentary sometime before class,) but I was looking forward to a morning that I didn't have to do anything. For the past week I've either had food bank, or publix pickup, or babysitting Lincoln, and then church yesterday. So I had been looking forward to a morning that I didn't have anything I had to do for a while.  I still got up at 4:47. I don't care though. That's the time I get up every morning. I always slept super hard for like six hours and then I'm wide awake. I don't know why the same exact time every morning though. I know the LDN does something for your endorphins and they suggest taking it the moment you go to sleep because of insomnia, but I go to bed at different times every night. If Peppy is here, I'm awak...

*The WEF announced the theme for their Davos 2023 meeting-  "preparing for the next pandemic."   This is not suspicious at all. Especially when you think about the covid preparedness simulation they had less than three months before the pandemic actually became a thing.  *Could it be  camel flu  that is up next? * Trans  child surgery has risen 13x in the past decade.  *'Gate to hell'  sinkhole  has been found near a Russian ski resort.  *Human organs were harvested and trafficked in the name of  fashion . *Gage told me that  goblin mode was the Oxford English Dictionaries 2022 word of the year. First off, that is two words. And secondly, what does that mean? Apparently it is like the scary, raw, real version of yourself. If you love me when I'm easy to love, you have to love me in my goblin mode . I think that is what it means at least. What a very weird word of the year. It is extremely relevant to the culture of the time, b...

Nimrod, the great grandson of Noah, is credited in the bible for being over the construction of the tower of Babel. From various ancient texts, including the Epic of Gilgamesh, you can learn a lot more about Nimrod. Nimrod was also known as Osiris, and his wife Semiramis was also known as Isis and and Ishtar (Easter.) They are credited to the first world empire, Babel, or Babylon.  The bible says Nimrod was a "mighty hunter before the Lord," and the legends claim he was a giant slayer. Only he wasn't slaying them to destroy any kind of evil. He was killing them because he considered them his competition. According to the book of Jasher, Nimrod is decapitated by Esau. After his death, his wife claimed that an evergreen tree randomly sprang to life overnight, which meant that Nimrod was going to come back to life. She claimed that every year on the anniversary of his birth (supposedly December 25th, but sometimes around the winter solstice) he would visit the tree and leave...

This artificial womb facility straight from the Matrix movies is only a concept idea, but it is easy to imagine the technology for something like this already existing. I feel like this would completely destroy that natural bond between a mother and her child, and it sounds like a great way to create a generation of emotionless sociopaths. (I guess that it is a little redundant.) It kind of reminds of that one case study of the monkey that was raised by a  metal doll . Of course it comes with an app. Everything comes with an app. You can sing straight to your baby and even wear a little vibrating vest to feel the baby kick. I was actually surprised that there wasn't some VR birthing experience. I want to know how you are supposed to trust that your baby's pod is actually blasting the music you choose. How do you know that they aren't blasting screams and cries and sounds of explosions instead?  Science fiction is becoming science fact. Especially if covid/the vaccine has ca...

This is an actual picture from a  NASA photography  site. Release the space Kraken?! There might be a logical explanation, but I'm going with a space octopus. It also kind of looks like that hydra vulgaris that doctors have claimed to have found in the vaccine vials.  *The parents who refused to give their baby  vaccinated blood  had him taken away from them until the surgery will be completed, which should be sometime in January. This might not seem so bad on the surface, but think about the conscious and subconscious trauma a six month old baby would have during the recovery of a major operation without his parents there to comfort him. They will get their baby back, but it won't be the child they remember, and that is heartbreaking.  *Tons of  pediatric gender confirming  clinics have popped up in just fifteen years. *Google will soon introduce  behavioral interventions  that will "pre-bunk misinformation." When I was 14 the internet ...

I googled my name to make sure that it didn't lead you straight to this blog. I like the fact that I don't have a big audience here. I'm not trying to build a following or make any money from sponsors. I use this space mostly to work out things in my head and to document the things in my life before I forget them. It is more like being inside my brain than it would be like sitting next to me having a conversation. Once the awkward barrier is broken, I let my freak flag fly, but usually I am content being the quiet observer.  Anyway, so I googled my name and found out that a woman with my name who is also 38 years old died in May of this year. So if anyone happens to come looking for me, they will think that I am dead. I also googled my email address and it just took me to news stories about a sex slave trapped in a crate. So it looks like I am all in the clear.  I'm still in that zoom Revelation class that my friend invited me to, but the leaders of the group are follow...

*The  Euphrates River  is continuing to dry up. According to Revelation, when the Euphrates is dry, four bound angels will be released and will kill 1/3 of humanity. According to the Quran, when the Euphrates dries up there will be a mountain of gold underneath and men from all over the world will come for the gold, 99 out of 100 dying in the process. There's gold under them there rivers! *Qatar acknowledges that between 400-500 migrant workers were killed while building the infrastructure for the  World Cup . I've never watched the World Cup in my entire life, but I don't know how anyone could support it after knowing that.  * Neuralink  hopes to implant brain chips in humans within six months. Elon Musk also plans to implant one in himself. Don't forget what happened to the test monkeys. In early 2022 a poll showed only 13% of people thought brain chips were a good idea. That was almost a year ago though, and since then lots of people have had lingering cogni...

There are so many movies where we end up rooting for the good guy until the very last moment when we realize we have been fooled and have actually been cheering on the villain. What if the same is with christianity and Christ? What if this guy isn't the Messiah? source Oh wait a minute. That is NOT the Lord. People have done a lot of terrible things in this guy's name. I don't have a personal relationship with this man. Historical accounts say this person is actually Cesare Borgia, who was an illegitimate son of Pope Alexander VI. If this dude comes in on the clouds and wants you to follow him DO NOT GO. How can I be so certain that this is not the son of God? Well, for a few reasons actually. You can trace the roots of this 'white christ' back to 4th century Rome. Up until then, all depictions of Christ were of an ugly, dark skinned man. According to a verse in Isaiah 53, Messiah had no beauty about him that would cause people to flock to him and follow him. (Unlik...